New Year

This year we will be studying the New Testament in Sunday School. The LDS ward that I am a part of is like another family for me, so being able to learn about the Savior's life with them is a very rewarding experience. They have all been through many trials and their wisdom and understanding of the Atonement of Jesus Christ has played a big role in my healing. I am grateful to the amazing people in my ward.

This year I will be trying to focus on the tender mercies of the Lord in my life and in the life of those around me. I am often beating myself up over the things that I have done and the pain I have caused. My mind torments me with reminders of my mistakes and of my family I have torn apart. I often feel as though I can never be forgiven and that the damage I have caused is not repairable. Thankfully, a loving Savior is helping me to realize that those thoughts are not coming from him and that they just aren't true. The Savior allows you to feel the pain and guilt necessary for change, but he also allows his immense love to show itself in your life and to help you feel peace and happiness. I thought that it would be impossible for me to feel any happiness because of what I have done. But, through the the tender mercies of the Lord, I have been able to feel peace and joy amidst the anguish and despair. It is amazing how well the Savior knows us and how active he is in each of our lives. We just have to be able to really focus on it so that we can recognize it.

My trial, and any trial for that matter, is not easy. I am battling it every day. I am on a road to recovery that is filled with obstacles. There are many influences every day that could either drag me down or build me up. But one thing that I have noticed that has helped more than anything is letting Heavenly Father know that you are willing to change and that it is your true desire. Just acknowledging that is a HUGE step. If you are struggling with a personal trial, the first step is acknowledging it and then truly having the desire to change. If you are struggling with a trial that was not brought on by yourself, then acknowledging that you want to make it through the trial and that you can't do it without the help of your Savior will do wonders for you. That simple acknowledgement will open up the floodgates for the Spirit to work miracles in your life and help you through anything. Saying this is the easy part. Putting it into action can be very difficult. I know that it can be done and I have seen many tender mercies from the Lord because of it.

I know that we have a Savior that lives and that his Atonement can help heal anything that is going on in our lives. I know that when we take the step to try and turn our lives over to him we will see and feel his love abundantly. I have a long ways to go in my trial and many more obstacles to overcome. But I know that the Savior can ease our burdens and bring us much needed peace. In a talk by Elder Scott, he said that the Atonement can help you "start over again and change your course from a downward, twisting, disappointing path to a superhighway to peace and happiness." That is very comforting and I know that it is true. Here's to a new year and new opportunities to change, grow, and become better.