Thanksgiving

It has been too long since I wrote but what better day than Thanksgiving :) It has been a great day for me and my kids. My whole family is in town and I have been able to spend some precious time with them and my kids. I feel very blessed and humbled as I ponder the many blessings I have.

I have mentioned before that one thing I struggle with is being WAY too hard on myself. As we go through trials it is hard not to be selfish and think only of ourselves because we are hurting or struggling. The times that I have pondered my many blessings and shifted my focus to gratitude have helped me to overcome negativity and think of others. Of course, as we struggle through our imperfections and trials, we need to focus on our personal growth. We need to give time to ourselves so that we can change, learn, and grow. But what better way to do that then by showing gratitude and loving others. The more we can shift our focus away from our problems and focus on the positive, the more we can grow. I'm not saying to brush things under the rug and avoid our problems. I'm saying that even when we are going through the most difficult trials, we can find so many things to be grateful for.

I love my Savior. I love my kids. I love my family and friends. I love the simple things in life we are provided with that help bring peace and comfort. Beds, clothes, food, nature, running water, and so on and so on. I am truly blessed and grateful. One of the greatest blessings that we can all partake of every day is the miracle of the Atonement. We can all be cleansed and healed through the Atonement of our Savior. The list of blessings can fill many pages, but at the top of that list is the Atonement. The Atonement encompasses everything. I am so grateful for a loving Heavenly Father who cares for us all individually.

I feel the need to say that NO MATTER the trial you face, no matter what you have done or what has been done to you, the Atonement will heal you. On this day of Thanksgiving I give thanks to my God, for He has provided us all with a way back to Him. As we move into December and the Christmas season, I give thanks for the ultimate gift: Our Savior.

I need to try and live everyday like it is Thanksgiving because everyday I am alive is another day I can improve, change, and grow. I have so many things I want to type right now but knowing me it will just turn into a jumbled mess. I will call it good for the night and leave with this thought: Giving thanks is not just simply acknowledging something good in your life, it is allowing that something to help you change and become better.

Forgive Yourself

I struggle immensely with forgiving myself. I beat myself up pretty bad. It is like a boxing match sometimes and I am constantly getting knocked down. You can't avoid guilt and sorrow for sin. Those feelings will come and they are necessary for change and repentance. But beating ourselves up for our past is a common tool used by the adversary to keep us down. We, for the most part, are very hard on ourselves and we all need to STOP! Allow yourself to feel what you need to feel but do not allow yourself to be unforgiving.

The adversary wants to keep us down. He wants us to suffer and be depressed. He does not want us to feel the good fruits of repentance and change. The more we hate ourselves the harder it will be to progress. Get on your knees and pray for the ability to forgive yourself and feel that comfort. I know that it is a challenge. I have such a hard time with it. I just tear myself apart sometimes and it is not healthy. God loves us so much and is ready and willing to help. Yes, we need to feel sorrow and we need to feel pain. But we cannot allow ourselves fall into despair and sadness because we cannot forgive ourselves.

I know how hard it can be. I still struggle with it. But I know that as we turn our hearts and thoughts to God and strive to do whats right, we will begin to feel that forgiveness of ourselves. We don't need to be so hard on ourselves and it is ok to recognize the good things that we do and remember that we are good people. Even with the heavy burden of sin, addiction, or physical ailments, we can know that as we strive to change and repent we can feel forgiveness come over us and be confident that we are choosing the right. And if sometimes it feels like no one cares and you are unhappy with yourself, know that God loves you and He wants what is best for you.

Forgive yourself so that you can be free.

Rough

You will have rough days like today. Keep your head up and push through. Focus on the positive and on those things that will bring you closer to God. Learn what you can and know that tomorrow is a new day. Don't give up, no matter how hard it is.